Our body language is controlled by our feelings and thoughts.
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Most of us are not conscious of our body language. We somewhat control our facial expressions, but when it comes to gestures and body movements, we allow our subconscious mind to control them. If we know what influences our body language, we can control it better. By controlling our body language, we can handle communications and situations the way we wish to.
Our bodies express our feelings of dislike, respect, abhorrence, affection, pity, fear and so on. Even when we control our words, we often express our true feelings through body language. We might shrink our nose seeing food that we dislike, tap our toes when we are impatient, or raise our eyebrows when we are surprised, all without a thought.
Our emotions dictate our movements and facial expressions. Therefore, when you are looking to control your body language, you need to control your instinctive reactions. You must practice not to respond till you have given a thought on how you must react. Till then, keep yourself from expressing anything. Remaining neutral till you have thought of an appropriate response will help you to express what you want to express and not what you feel like expressing.
It is especially important to control negative responses such as:
Rolling of eyes
Shrinking of nose
Giving a sarcastic smile
Rubbing your nose or touching your ears
Looking at your watch
Looking here and there while in a conversation
Looking at your toes while in conversation
Even though we are not trained in picking up bodily signals, we take cues from a person’s body language all the time to understand them. Negative body language is picked up subconsciously by the other person. Therefore, when you want to create a favourable impression, you need to control instinctive reactions, and give controlled or measured responses.
Using Thoughts to Control Body Language
By changing your thoughts, you can easily control your body language. If you are aware of the situation in which you will find yourself, you can overcome negative thoughts about the situation or the people in it by thinking positive. If you have negative feelings and thoughts about a place, a person or a situation, it is difficult not to let it show through your body language. To turn negative body language into neutral or positive expressions, you need to change your thoughts from negative to positive, if only for the time being.
Negative thoughts might not necessarily be bad thoughts. It might be your discomfort, fear, impatience, aggressiveness, etc. that can cause difficulties for you. If you believe your personal traits can hurt you, remain thoughtful and check your reactions.
Developing a positive outlook helps to limit negative reactions immensely. If you know exactly how you would react to a situation, you can even practice controlling expressing negative responses. For instance, if you know that a person will negatively remark on your hairstyle, you can prepare yourself to handle that remark by determining your response beforehand. That will help you to handle any negative situation the way you want to handle it.
Pdtraining delivers 1000’s of professional development courses each year in Auckland, Christchurch, Wellington and other cities, so you can be assured your training will be delivered by a qualified and experienced trainer.
All public Body Language Training courses include am/pm tea, lunch, printed courseware and a certificate of completion. Customised courses are available upon request so please contact pdtraining on 0800 003150 to learn more.